Living With My Mistakes

It's funny how actual sentences sometimes play in your mind, as if they're being spoken aloud by a narrator. Usually, my brain hosts a shifting thought salad of feelings, ideas and concepts: neat from the source, undiluted. Thoughts don't naturally take the form of words, but colours, feelings, notions, and knowledge. My raw material needs to be fractioned into something else before it can be understood by any other interface. When I write about the messages from In Here, they've been pre-distilled and fashioned to form proper sentences for export.

I’ve written about it before, but on many, many occasions over the past several months, one sentence keeps appearing in my head, pre-refined and ready to ship:

I'm so glad I don't drink any more.

Alcohol-Free LivingFay7 July 2019alcohol free, sober livingComment

Tuned to a new frequency

When you stop drinking, you wonder how you'll ever have fun again. What in the world could possibly feel as incredible as the blissful release of glass two? What'll replace the intimacy of friends leaning in to share dreams like stolen kisses? Will you ever laugh again like you did at the memes of those magnesium-bright nights? And just how will you explain your behaviour if you don't have the convenient excuse of “Sorry, I was really drunk...”

What you don't realise is, in the words of the prophet David, you're always crashing in the same car.

And in the words of the prophet Fay, sooner or later it's going to steal you away, so please stop doing this to yourself, you beautiful, lost creature...

Alcohol-Free LivingFay6 January 2019alcohol free, sobeer, sober living Comment